If you’re ready to start your estate plan but your spouse is hesitant, you’re not alone. At Phoenix Law in Sherwood, Arkansas, we help individuals and couples navigate these challenges with clarity and confidence. This article explains why spouses may resist estate planning, how to approach the conversation with compassion, and what steps you can take today to protect your family’s future.
What to Do When You’re Ready to Create Your Estate Plan but Your Spouse Isn’t
November 20, 2025
Starting your estate plan is a powerful and responsible step toward protecting your family, staying organized, and ensuring your wishes are honored if you become incapacitated or when you die. But what happens when you’re ready to plan—and your spouse isn’t?
Maybe they roll their eyes, change the subject, insist it’s unnecessary, or agree to a meeting only to shut it down once the conversation gets real. Their hesitation can leave you feeling frustrated or even hopeless.
The good news? You can still move forward, protect your family, and—often sooner than you’d expect—bring your spouse on board.
Why One Spouse Often Says “No” to Estate Planning
Estate planning in Arkansas isn’t only about documents. It can stir up deep emotions, misconceptions, and fears. While one spouse may see planning as an act of love and responsibility, the other may interpret it completely differently.
Common reasons a spouse may resist estate planning include:
- Fear of cost or complexity
- Discomfort thinking about mortality
- Procrastination or prior negative experiences
- Concerns about control or trust
Some assume estate planning is expensive, intimidating, or only for the wealthy.
Talking about incapacity or death can feel morbid or unlucky.
A bad experience with a lawyer—or simply being overwhelmed with life—can create resistance.
Some worry about losing control of assets or decisions.
Understanding the reason for hesitation makes it far easier to address the concern with compassion instead of conflict.
How to Talk with Your Spouse About Estate Planning
Pushing harder rarely works. A supportive conversation works much better.
- Acknowledge their feelings
- Focus on shared values
- Use real-life examples
- Invite—don’t pressure
“I get that this feels heavy. But I want us both to feel protected.”
Instead of talking about documents, talk about protecting each other, your kids, and your home.
If you’ve seen someone struggle without a plan, gently explain how you want to avoid that.
Invite them to come with you to a Life & Legacy Planning® Session at Phoenix Law.
Many spouses relax once they understand the process is supportive—not stressful.
What You Can Do If Your Spouse Still Isn’t Ready
Even if your spouse refuses to participate, you still have options—and taking action now protects your family.
- Create your own Life & Legacy Plan
- Lead by example
- Keep communication open
- Revisit later
You can:
– protect your assets
-name guardians for your children
-choose your healthcare and financial decision-makers
– ensure your wishes are honored
Once your spouse sees the peace of mind you gain, they often come around.
Share updates and involve them in small steps, like reviewing beneficiary designations.
Life changes—new baby, move, illness, retirement—often open the door to planning.
Protecting the People You Love, No Matter What
Estate planning in Arkansas isn’t just about documents. It’s about reducing stress, preventing conflict, and giving your loved ones clarity and protection.
Even if your spouse isn’t ready, you can still take meaningful steps now.
As your Personal Family Lawyer® and trusted Arkansas estate planning attorney, I help ensure that your family has the clarity and guidance they need—both now and when you’re no longer here.
Take the Next Step Today
If you're ready to create a plan that truly protects your family:
501-300-7526 (PLAN)
Visit http://www.phoenixestateplan.com
Schedule your FREE Discovery Call
We look forward to helping you create a Life & Legacy Plan that gives you confidence, clarity, and peace of mind.
